Okay, I have been tolerant. I have been patient. I have quietly bitten my tongue and endured the overt display of “show biz” mentality, but after a month of this incessant display of hubris, I just had to vent. No, I ‘m not talking about Kanye and the “imma let you finish” shtick. No, I’m here today because Joe Bonamassa must be stopped! Oh sure, it all started innocently enough. “Like Jimi Hendrix? You need to download my free album!” Okay, cute. Possibly an apt comparison. I’ve heard Joe’s stuff. He’s a really good player. Never really saw the Hendrix comparison, but maybe he’s changing direction a bit. Okay, I’ll check the album out. The next day, he’s implying he’s the new Jimmy Page or something. This, of course, was met by internet trolls with a wonderfully scathing list of insults, name-calling, and lathered threats to start a campaign that would have all keepers of the Zeppelin gospel boycott future Joe Bonamassa concerts. Basically, grab a bowl of popcorn and start scrolling, it’s more entertaining than Bonamassa’s music anyway.
Okay, I will go on record saying I like Joe Bonamassa as much as the next guy … err … the next guy who likes Joe Bonamassa, I mean. But, wow, that’s pretty bold. Both Hendrix and Page? He’s got a pretty high opinion of himself. Leaving those ads up after getting a virtual smack-down from a bunch of 14-year-old classic rock experts was possibly suicidal. Meh, I wasn’t concerned yet. Comparing yourself to products greater than you really does invite the “I knew Jack Kennedy. You’re no Jack Kennedy” response, but heck, sometimes you need a little controversy. Unfortunately, it didn’t stop there. It quickly escalated every couple of days for the next few weeks. Sure, I could have hit the kill button and stopped them (brilliant feature of Facebook), but honestly there was a train wreck mentality about it. I just had to see who he would pit himself up again next. Well that and the comments were truly amusing. The Internet appears divided between the “Love them both” crowd and the “I met Joe Bonamassa once, and he kicked my dog” crowd. A few people offered some musical critiques of the various artists depicted, attempting to refute any similarities between the iconic guitarist selected and Joe. I mean, this is all great. Some people are entitled to their own opinions; others, not so much.
I mostly point this stuff out as an example to the many local artists and musicians I deal with on a daily basis, because there are sooooo many lessons to be learned here. First of all, I am long on record that you should never give your music away for free. Yes, maybe it worked for Radiohead, and it will probably work for Joe Bonamassa (who gets a pass because it’s a greatest hits album and not a new release). You, however, are not Radiohead … or Joe Bonamassa. Next, overt comparisons, particularly to artists whose heydays were 30-40 years ago, do not make those artist’s fans buy your music. In fact, those comparisons say, “Hi, I’m stuck in the 70’s. I’m a musician impersonator. I have no originality to my playing. I justify this by overtly comparing myself to the people who invented the style I emulate — people that you (rightly or wrongly) hold up as sacred cows. I say, they are not gods, and I am here to tell you that your praise of them is wrong, for I, a mere mortal, have matched them!” (Okay, at least that’s what it’s saying to me.) Even worse, comparing yourself to seemingly every iconic band in multiple genres!? We are to believe that Joe is just like Phish, Queen, and the White Stripes? That’s got to be the living definition of an apples to oranges to pears to lychees comparison. (Yes, lychees are a thing, look it up.) Third, pay attention to your fans. If people who like you and have followed you for some length of time start saying that they’re embarrassed for you, or telling you that possibly comparing yourself to Freddy Mercury is a bit of a stretch, then maybe they have that objective view you’re looking for.
Now, maybe it’s possible Joe didn’t have time to go back and see the comments/debates that were now running rampant in the posts. This is completely understandable. He’s playing a cruise ship gig right now (really spotty Internet) and is getting ready to kick of a European tour. He’s got other things on his mind. At this point, it is probably best to pay a marketing firm to handle promotion of your … um … free album. (Okay, go back to point #1 there.) Because then we start going from marketing by way of “slightly arrogant comparisons” to, this is completely unprofessional.
“Prodigy” is a person possessing exceptional qualities, typically younger than would be expected for their level of talent. “Progeny” is an heir, descendant, or offspring. It seems to me he’s kind of mixed the two up here. You ARE a prodigy. You are SOMEONE ELSE’s progeny. I’m pretty sure he meant the later, seeing has how BB is a big supporter of Joe’s, having given him some of his first gigs.
And it just seems it get’s weirder the more you go on. Classic Genesis? Seriously, a band that has zero blues influence or stylings in their music?!
Oh, and a group that didn’t even have a guitarist!? Seriously, Joe, have you ever even heard these bands?
When I saw this one, I really had to rack my brain for a few minutes to figure out whether it as Joe or me that was completely insane. When was Ozzy in the Eagles?!
Seriously, the sunglasses are just for show right? I mean, you’re not blind? Wrong words … wrong pictures … irrelevant comparisons … honestly … I can give you the names of some musically-savvy PR teams who can do this kind of stuff for you. They work cheap. You can pay them out of merch sales.
This latest one has been running for a week, proving that nobody is reading the comments or doing any sort of market focus studies to see how the ads are playing out. I don’t think this one is strictly Joe’s fault. You see, Bon Jovi has always been too polite to correct him for calling him Billy all these years.
It’s getting to be like a collector’s baseball card game. Question is: Has anybody seen the Stevie Ray Vaughn ad? That one might actually be a fair comparison. In fact, it’s probably the only one that’s a fair comparison. He should have led with that and left it alone. Really, though, I shouldn’t get all critical. It’s just a Facebook ad. Far greater sins have been committed in that right-most column of my timeline when you think about it. For example …
